With the foundation of previous blogs explaining what Block Therapy is, I would like share the moment that became the impetus for what you know as Block Therapy. This moment birthed what we recognize today as Fluid Isometrics and Block Therapy.
It was the turn of the century. I was 30 years old and in my second “failed” marriage. I was also going through a painful business separation. For years I had been using alcohol to numb the stress, although I had been sober for a few months. I remember asking my sister if there was anything wrong with me. She said, “All that matters is whether you are happy”.
That was a profound statement, I had always worried about everyone else’s happiness, never my own. I realized in that moment that I needed to take a good long look at myself and make some changes.
As many of us do when we take that look at ourselves, we usually start with the physical body. And, to add insult to injury, we often choose a body part that we like the least. My focus for a long time was on my abdomen. The 50 extra pounds I was carrying seemed to be centered in my core, which was a place of extreme self-loathing. I had always envied women with beautiful hourglass figures. I actually believed that if I had the belly I desired I would never feel stress.
It wasn’t just vanity. Large a factor as that was, it wasn’t the principal reason I so obsessively hated this area. It felt ugly. There was a combination of feelings and sensations surrounding it that made me profoundly unhappy. Now I know that one of the main reasons was that I was filled with waste. How can we feel beautiful and sexy with years of undigested food and waste trapped inside us?
I also couldn’t move with the freedom I desired. Because I was so compacted and compressed, my movements were laboured and awkward. All I wanted was to be free. My ability to express myself was trapped in the folds of tissue that weighed me down. It was as if gravity had imprisoned the carefree child I once had been.
“Thank you Deanna for caring enough to bring the Block to life to give life to our cells and a healthier life to us all! Breathe and Believe” ~ Myrna
As mentioned, I had been experiencing a lot of personal challenges, and the anxiety was ramping up. One particular evening, I was flurrying in the worst anxiety attack I had ever known. It was absolutely terrifying. I’m sure many of you have experienced this: being frozen with fear. I felt paralyzed, stuck in a dizzying vortex of guilt and shame. For a moment, I thought I might die; I couldn’t breathe.
Then it happened. I dove my hand into my belly.
It wasn’t a conscious act; it was a reaction to not breathing. That initial plunge triggered an exhalation filled with pain and fear, straight from the core, that cleared the way for breath, for life. I sucked in the air as though I had come up from under water and got a hold of myself. In that moment, I gained control.
Next Week: The Birth of Block Therapy – Part 2